About three years ago a pained woman came into my life in an unusual way. And for some reason, God gave me a deep, compassionate love for her. She had had a terrible upbringing full of darkness and abuse that I can't begin to imagine. I strongly felt that God wanted me to show her His unconditional love. She is a staunch atheist, and of course I am a staunch Christian. And yet we were able to be friends on another level. We shared pregnancies and life's ups and downs for three years. Then, for some unknown reason, she went from loving me to detesting me in three short days. I know the enemy had his hand in this. Perhaps I was getting too close? Perhaps I was starting to leave a dent?
It's just been an incredibly painful process to have someone you invested so much into throw so much back into your face with such malicious intent. When you've shown nothing but love to someone, have them hurl such venom back. It's the first time in my entire life I've had someone say such intentionally awful things to me to try to leave deep, lasting wounds. And while I'm wounded on one level, it's not in the way she intended. None of the levels she aimed at were hit. It's more of a sorrow for her. She's chosen to try to leave a wake of pain in the lives of others because she herself has been pained. She wants others to experience the misery she has experienced. It's so sad. And yet it reminds me of Christ. He came to show nothing but love to the entire world. And He was rejected at every level by many. How it must have grieved His heart. Of course, I am in no way comparing myself to Christ. But He did let us know that we too would experience the same pain of rejection.
John 15
18"If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. 19If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. 20Remember the words I spoke to you: 'No servant is greater than his master.'b]">[b] If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also. If they obeyed my teaching, they will obey yours also. 21They will treat you this way because of my name, for they do not know the One who sent me. 25But this is to fulfill what is written in their Law: 'They hated me without reason.'c]">[c]
And it was without reason that I was rejected and spat upon. All I can pray is that the seeds I cast along the path will be watered by others that follow me. Only God knows His working in her heart. He is truly the only one who can soften and harden hearts. Oh God, please extend the greatness of your mercy down on her and her two beautiful children!
Some other verses that brought me comfort:
Matthew 5:10-12
10Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 11"Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. 12Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
c]">Romans 12:14
Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.
II Tim 3
12In fact, everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted, 13while evil men and impostors will go from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived.
Romans 8
28And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,j]">[j] whok]">[k] have been called according to his purpose.
31What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? 33Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. 34Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. 35Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?
37No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,m]">[m] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
2 Corinthians 12:9-11 (New International Version)
9But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 10That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Jeremiah 20:11
11But the A)">(A)LORD is with me like a dread champion;
Therefore my B)">(B)persecutors will stumble and not prevail
They will be utterly ashamed, because they have failed,
With an C)">(C)everlasting disgrace that will not be forgotten.
1 Peter 4:12-14
Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ's sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed. If you are insulted for the name of Christ, you are blessed, because the Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you.
1 Peter 4:16
Yet if anyone suffers as a Christian, let him not be ashamed, but let him glorify God in that name.
So God, I pray that Your strength is shown in this situation. I pray that Your name is glorified. I pray that Your glory is revealed. Thank You for considering me worthy to be persecuted for Your name. And help me to truly mean that.
